Such as are in the institution (of marriage) wish to get out… Excerpt from a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson
May 10, 2009
We are experiencing very tough financial times and, while the actual divorce rates are down, the quality of marriage is suffering tremendously. Many people can’t afford to divorce right now, but I predict that when the stock and real estate markets start to recover, we will see a spike in divorce rates.
I say this because, along with articles I have read in the past eight months about divorce rates declining, I myself have been hit with a deluge of calls from those who are unhappily married and just waiting out the economy to bring divorce proceedings. What’s worse is that many of these people might otherwise go to counseling but they can’t afford it! I’m afraid that too much damage will have been done.
Of course, a down economy is not usually enough by itself to cause a marital relationship to sour. There are often other factors that come into play such as too much drug and alcohol use, poor or non-existent communication between spouses, other stressors such as having children, a mortgage or rent that is too high, a loved one being ill or dying, depression or mental illness, or living with pain, to name a few.
My advice to anyone in this type of situation is to get support! This doesn’t have to cost money - it can come in the way of reaching out to friends and telling them what is really going on, going to church/temple, 12-step programs, as well as visiting local community mental health agencies that often have sliding scale fees available.
When tough financial times hit, it can be tempting to put mental health on a back burner but I assure you that taking care of your “insides” will go a long way in making you feel better, giving you a different perspective on your situation and potentially even helping turn things around for you and your spouse.
A tip for searching for these services on the internet:
Google the name of the county or town in which you live, then “low fee counseling.” You are likely to find a local, state or county run organization that provides such services. If none is listed, contact the agencies that come up directly and ask them where they might suggest (since they are likely to know of more resources).
Finally, if you have insurance, don’t forget to contact them to take full advantage of coverage they may offer you.
If you need further help in finding appropriate mental health support, feel free to contact us and we will do what we can to assist you in getting the right resources.
Tags: bad marriage, contemplating divorce, deciding to divorce, divorce support, marital troublesComments
Got something to say?